Thursday, December 31, 2009

The Unwanted Indian Politician

Disclaimer: The following is a work of fiction as politicians do not go to Heaven. Straight, plain, simple and true.

Once upon a time (since it is a fairy tale) the angel Gabriel came up to the Lord and said "I have a serious problem. We've got some Indians up here in Heaven and they have created havoc. They have put up traffic barriers and are wearing Armani kurtas instead of their simple white robes. They are also riding BMW's and Mercedes', instead of the chariots and are insisting on registration numbers between 1 and 10. "

"They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clear and are forever missing sermons for what they call Working Committee meetings. They have put up party flags and hand symbols all over Heaven and are even challenging your election as being undemocratic.They have given out contracts to the holy food providers to supply samosas and tea to their meetings. The others are being very inconvenienced and they need to be disciplined. Oh Lord please help me!"

The Lord as usual listens patiently, then holds his head "Who is this Amar Singh guy?" He asks.

Gabriel shakes his head and says "All I know is that I got an SMS from him saying that he supports my election from the minority community....whatever that means."

"Well" says the Lord "He's set up a hotline between Heaven and Hell and Satan is on the line now and i just have to say the word 'Mayawati' to disconnect"

Satan on line 1 Sir . "Yes ...this is the Lord what can I do for you".

"Lord , Hi, i was wondering if you have been facing the same problem as us down here?" says Satan. " We have got a bunch of Indians who have practically taken over the place. They blend in with their saffron robes and have started planting Lotuses all over Hell." "They have practically destroyed the character of this place and have started installing air conditioning and have imposed what they call as a Uniform Civil Code."

"I am quite fed up and have decided once and for all that my people are not going to take in anyone with the Keywords "Indian" "Politician" involved with them. You can have them all if you want."

"Nooooooo...." says the Lord "Not over my dead body (sic)." "Lets just keep sending them back and let them fight it out amongst themselves."

In the absence of consensus the onus of broking a deal fell back on who else but 'Amar Singh' (The Immortal Lion).

Finally after much persuasion and reservation of few administrative seats for secular parties and minorities in both Heaven and Hell it has been decided to create a Buffer Zone where all the Indian Politicians will be kept and their memories erased so that they cannot have any 'Raaz Pichle Janam Ka'. Signing out..... 'Mayawati'!!!!!

1 comment:

  1. hahhahhahha!really funny!!!!good going blogger!

    ReplyDelete